Precious Moments....

I had a bit of a wake-up call yesterday, so to speak. I was having one of those days...trying to get a ton of stuff done, feeling like someone was asking me for something, or to do something (including the dog) every 15 seconds...trying desperately to be productive, but not having much success...yada, yada, yada.

Well, I *finally* got Ms. Brooke down to sleep...ahhhhhh....success!!! I could get the floors clean, and get the laundry started, and all those other tasks I attempt to cram into that lovely period of the day we call "nap time". As I began to busy myself, Connor reminded me that he had slept in his own bed the night before and hadn't yet had his gum ball reward...so, I let him pick a gum ball, and sent him on his merry way. He asked to go play in his room, and I told him he could as long as he promised to be quiet, as his room is right next to Brooke's, and again, naptime is precious....

I finally had the main floor to myself and was extremely thankful. I was beginning to clean the counters when I heard a strange and horrific sound coming from Connor's room. My first instinct was to shout " BE Q-U-I-E-T"....I couldn't believe that he was shrieking like that when I had specifically told him to play quietly in his room...and he promised! But, the awful sound continued--and quickly turned into an eerie gagging noise, and then, it hit me like a ton of bricks...gum ball. He had taken his gum ball with him upstairs...I was so busy worrying about how and when I was going to get everything done that I had forgotten to ask him to bite it in front of me. Panic set in. Like the kind of panic where you break into an immediate sweat and being shaking uncontrollably. I RAN up the stairs where I found Connor half-way down, standing on the landing, grabbing his throat, face beet-red, tears streaming down his cheeks, gasping for air. Words can't describe the fear that gripped me in that moment. Everything I'd learned in the many CPR classes I've taken was a blurry haze...so, I grabbed him instinctually and thumped him on the back, and in that moment I heard a scream from deep within his throat and thought--AIR--he's able to scream so he's getting air--that means that he's breathing!!!!!!!! Thank you Lord, Thank you, Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU!!!!!!

I scooped him up carried him to the couch, and held him in my arms while I cried and he cried. We had both been scared beyond belief, and that kind of fear and anxiety brings out more emotions that one can even begin to sort out. We stayed like that for a long, long time, until his little body ceased shaking, and he fell asleep in my arms. I held onto him as tight as possible, stroking his hair, and kissing the top of his head. As I sat there I was faced with pictures of him all around me--on the fridge, on the walls, framed and loose. From Connor as a baby with hair sticking up all over his sweet head, to a picture of he and Brooke taken last fall, laughing together in the double stroller on a care-free September day. I was granted such an incredible realization of just how PRECIOUS life is. I can't tell you the last time my first-born sat on my lap with me for more than 5 minutes--mostly because I'm always jumping up to do something. I don't hold him that much anymore. I encourage independant play. Though we do play together during Brookie's naps a lot of days (Candy Land, or a craft), a good part of the time we're sitting there, I'm not fully enjoying the moment like I should be, but instead, thinking of all the things that need to be done......

Anyway, the point to all this rambling is that I had a great wake-up call yesterday. As I said in a previous post, I am really going to try to slow down this holiday season and enjoy just being. Just doing fun things with the kids without thinking about all of those meaningless things that I need to accomplish. So, this afternoon, Connor and I spent a couple of hours in the "craft room" making hair clips for each of the little girls in his class. Then, we played Candy Land, and I enjoyed every minute of it..."The Year Without a Santa Claus" was on in the background and it was sooo much fun just hanging out and watching it with him. Exactly what I've been wanting to do!


Tonight, we had a quiet evening (both kids have yucky colds again so we had to cancel a get-together with family :(, but we made the most of it! I had sooo much fun dancing around the kitchen, Christmas music playing throughout the house, lights twinkling, all the while making white and dark chocolate covered pretzels! How wonderfully Christmasy! I am soooo thankful for all that we have this year. I could not ask for anything more! We are sooo blessed to have such wonderfully amazing family and friends...and, I'm very thankful that I was given a wake-up call to remember just how precious life is--all life, and to not take for granted a single second of it!




XOXO to you all!